i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
