"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Randomize
