just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Randomize
