he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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