Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize
