I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
