He disabled his match.com account in front of me
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
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