I wish I could punch you in the face.
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
