Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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