"it" just moved
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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