; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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