Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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