My room smells like vodka and shame
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Randomize
