I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
