They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
