yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize