Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
