i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
