Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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