STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
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