you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize