fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize