No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
