Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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