One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
there is glitter all over my balls
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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