So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
