is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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