69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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