Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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