The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
