in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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