Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
i drank out of a bidet.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize
