all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
