So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
