Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
