She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
