That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
