Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize