i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Randomize
