therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize
