Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
