It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
soo... how was my night?
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