you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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