YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Randomize
