I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Randomize
