So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
