We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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