Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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