Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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