i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
